


Cold Snap

by mithril_owl



Category: Megamind (2010)
Genre: Cold Weather, Ficlet, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-01-30
Packaged: 2021-03-16 01:35:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29074179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mithril_owl/pseuds/mithril_owl
Summary: When weather interrupts the Plot of the Day, Roxanne gets to see behind-the scenes of a kidnapping.As expected, things do not go as planned.
Relationships: Megamind/Roxanne Ritchi, Minion & Roxanne Ritchi
Comments: 8
Kudos: 99





	Cold Snap

**Author's Note:**

> A quick and silly ficlet originally posted on Tumblr, and planned out in my head over many miserable cold mornings.

Roxanne wakes up staring at the ceiling of the invisible car with Minion’s soft singing in her ears. Beneath the noise of the radio and the gentle rumble of the engine, she can hear something occasionally scraping against the windows, punctuated by the occasional muffled outburst of what she assumes to be profanity, given the tone.

“Wh’s going on?” she murmurs, leaning back on her forearms. The chill from the leather makes her flinch.

“Apologies for the delay, Miss Ritchi! It seems as though the weather picked up while we were… er, attempting to subdue you. Sir is just clearing off the car.”

Ah.

Well, she doesn’t regret giving them a difficult time today (the ensuing chase around her apartment had taken nearly twenty minutes; the adorably frustrated look on Megamind’s face had absolutely been worth the carnage), but she does wish that she’d worn pants instead of a skirt.

“How are you feeling? Are you warm enough?” Minion turns in his dome, face twisting slightly as Roxanne sits up. Roxanne doesn’t quite know what to make of his expression until he reaches into the footwell to retrieve the blanket that must have slipped off her legs. She gratefully takes it from his surprisingly warm metal hands.

“I think I’ll be okay. How long has he been out there?” she snuggles deeper into the blanket and rubs her hands together.

“About seven or eight minutes, maybe longer? The snow turned into rain at one point, so there was a lot of ice to deal with.” Minion adjusts a few knobs on the centre console and Roxanne hums with relief as the rear seat warmers kick in.

Megamind has moved to her window to finish clearing the roof, which puts her eye-level with his chest. He’s swapped his standard leather ensemble for a long, sweeping charcoal wool coat with a high fur collar. It would be incredibly striking and appropriately villainous if he wasn’t also wrapped like a mummy in a hideous striped scarf and giant fluffy earmuffs.

“I’m surprised he didn’t make you do it,” Roxanne huffs.

“Oh, Sir never makes me go outside when the weather is like this.” Minion answers honestly. “I’m sure my heaters could handle it, but I think he’s just being overly–”

The wind picks up abruptly and a piercing howl echoes through the car. Roxanne watches a fine mist of snow dance down the empty street in the updraft. A second breeze shakes the car, and with a muffled ‘ _fwoomp!’_ snow cascades off the roof onto Megamind’s head. Briefly, he is silent.

“Oh no,” Roxanne chokes.

An enraged shriek in what she assumes is his native language is carried away on a third gust of wind, sending more snow into his face as his arms windmill to clear the icy spray.

Roxanne’s shoulders shake with mirth as Megamind continues to furiously finish the job with a vengeance. Even Minion is laughing and she has to cover her face with the blanket when he gives a watery snort.

She jumps when the back door is abruptly yanked open and a snow brush is violently hurled to the floor with a wet thump.

“–son of a–!!”

The door slams and Roxanne watches him storm over to the front of the car, desperately trying to conceal her amusement as Megamind flops into the passenger seat.

“Dammit all, it’s _everywhere_!” he unfurls the scarf and hurls it to his feet as though it were personally responsible for the weather. “Literally everywhere, evil gods… It’s in my gloves, it’s down my _neck–_ there is somehow snow _in_ my boots! Why do we live in this shi–”

Minion clears his throat and glances at the backseat. Megamind does a spectacular double take and Roxanne gives a cheeky wave beneath the blanket.

“Oh, Miss Ritchi… how… how long have you been awake?” Megamind grimaces. Roxanne grins wordlessly and he slumps into his seat with a tremendous groan.

“Just drive, Minion.”

**Author's Note:**

> Many hugs to Falling-Pixie for the [absolutely delightful drawing of Megamind's winter ensemble](https://falling-pixie.tumblr.com/post/641624609822752769/owlinabasket-its-freezing-outside-so-ive-had-a) and thanks to fishbaby for providing some [great information on Michigan weather](https://fishbaby.tumblr.com/post/641524235263787008/owlinabasket-its-freezing-outside-so-ive-had%22)! (I haven't been to the US since 2007, and most of my visits were in the summer... so the only non-Canadian winter weather I'm familiar with is the Southwest!)


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